A Painful Destiny
by Animechic24
Summary: Minako is trapped in a world filled with love, but no love for her. A nightmare occures and she realizes that she must not love or destruction will appear. When she lost everything, a spark of hope fills her heart. When she meats a certain piolet will she
1. Chapter One: A Nightmare of Truth

Chapter One: A Nightmare of Truth  
  
Ha ha! I love writing so, so, so much, that I'm going to write this for the heck of it! Man, when you have so many ideas for stories, but can't use them all in one story, it makes you want to make millions of stories! ^_~ Anyway, if this is a little focused on Minako, gomen, but I am Minako! *_* Let's start! Ü ::everybody frowns:: I thought you guys loved me, but you don't even like me! Oh well! Ü  
  
Dedication: This story is dedicated to PrincessVenus, so enjoy Bekki! ^^;  
  
Disclaimer: ::gasp:: Ah! I don't own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing! It's such a shocker! OMG! I thought I did!  
  
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The only thing that could be heard outside was the crickets singing, and every now and then a car driving by. The girl put down her glass of water, and sighed. She couldn't take her mind off her thoughts. Sometimes she felt though there was more to the curse, as if he made her think of it. Picking up a book, she started to try to read it, but could never read more then three sentences and forgot what she had read, she would try to read it over, no luck there. Her mind wasn't absorbed into the book, instead into her thoughts. She tried watching television, but there was no use in trying. Putting on the radio and turning out the lights, she thought of the songs story line, this worked better, but events still tried to swim in her mind. Love...love was used most in the songs. In fact there was hardly anything else, love was such an important thing. No matter how hard to try and ignore it, she found it everywhere. She was a big fan of music, and she sang herself. The sound of the melody made her smile, she would try to sleep better then last night. The song ended with a note of happiness. The next song started up, it was her favorite song. And it always made her sad, happy, and determined. Sad for love, happy for love, and determined for love. She dozed off as the song still played on.  
  
~*Dream*~  
  
A beautiful song played in the ball room. Minako watched her friends dance with other guys. She looked at the boys, but a shadow covered them up. You could see the boys were strong, tall, and cared much for their loves. Minako sighed and waited for somebody to ask her to dance. Her luck with men was not quite well. In fact, she couldn't remember a time when she had loved a man. Frowning, Minako watched the people dance. Girls in very elegant dresses and boys in sharp tuxedos danced, swaying with the rhythm of the music. Kunzite, the man she had liked before, was dancing with a girl in a powder blue dress. He smiled at the girl and his eyes twinkled with signs of true love and happiness. Seeing the girl and Kunzite made Minako happy for him, and sad that she couldn't find a true love.  
A platinum blonde haired walked over to her, and introduces himself. "Hello, ma'am, it's a pleasure to meet you, I'm ****** ******* ******" He said his name, but the minako out of the dream couldn't understand what he was saying. (we can't let minako know who he is)   
"Anio Minako, the pleasure is mine" She answered back.  
The two danced as a wonderful, beautiful song played. The song was all they could hear, and each other was all they could see. Minako's heart lifted, finally love came her way. She loved him, and he loved her, it was better then anything in her life. Love, now she felt what she inflicted upon so many people, she felt the pleasure that only true love could ever feel like.  
The scenery flashed and changed.  
A cruel, pure evil face flashed in front of Minako's eyes, he laughed at her. A voice rang inside of her head, telling her that she would never love. She looked at herself, her dress completely torn and bloody. "You brought this on yourself! You made your friends die! It's like you killed them yourself!"  
"No, no, I would never do such a thing..." Squeaked the small frightened voice of Minako.  
"But it's true! Isn't it! You set up the deaths of your friends. Now, only Princess Serenity lives, and do you think she'll want to live after what happened. She thinks you killed them. She thinks that you killed yourself as well, which is about what you did to yourself!"  
"No, no, no..." Was all that she could say, frightened and scared.  
"Yes, yes it's true, you killed them, and yourself mentally. You ruined any chance for other people to have love. You killed the universe. You have destroyed everything that has love. And nothing lives without love, only you. But you knew this. You are, afer all, the princess of love, you cause love, you don't get loved! You knew this and you let destruction come among your own friends! You killed them!" The evil man blamed.  
"I didn't mean it, I never meant anything to happen!" Minako cried.  
"But something did happen, and you caused it! You should die now! It'd be the only thing right, but it won't fix the destruction you forced upon so many people!"  
"Die? Die. Die...It would fix only some damage, but I'd be with my friends..Die...I think I'll do that."  
The evil man then left hearing this.  
Minako ran and ran. Entering a large palace, she kept on running. Slowing into a walk, she entered the heart of the palace, where a sword lay on a pedestal.   
"There's your answer to you problems...." A voice said. "The answer to everything..."  
"Yes, the answer.." Minako said. Minako walked closer to the sword, picked it up, and held it to her chest, right where her heart is.  
  
~*Out of Dream*~  
  
Minako woke up with a start, gasping. Something shined on her face, and she realized she was crying in her sleep. (I've done that before, it's such a weird feeling) Her heart pounded against her chest, and she cried the rest of the night, knowing where that vision/dream came from...The Moon Kingdom in the past.  
*No, no. I can't fall in love or people who love other people will die? I can't risk that. That man, he said to me that only I can live without love my whole life, I must be strong. But what about Princess Serenity, wasn't she in love? I just can't stand this! Help me!*  
  
  
The pain in her heart was unbearable, what did she do to her friends, how could she have done it. Ami, Rei, Makoto. Their deaths replayed before her eyes over and over again, Minako's heart was beating faster and faster. Her own love had died, because he loved her, this isn't fair! Her mind screamed. Why can't I love and be loved. Who was that guy? I never seen him here before, maybe he wasn't reborn. It must be for the better, right? All those lives, kami, I killed so many people! How, how could such terrible things happen. I saw them fall over, I saw them die. My friends, I can't protect them. I want to love, but I don't need it so much that they'd die. I can't stand it, I killed my friends. I committed suicide and killed myself, afraid of what Princess Serenity would think of me if she came face to face with me. Suicide was such a cowardly way out of pain, now it caused more then I can handle! What have I done?  
Minako cried the rest of the night, she never wanted to face her friends again. What would they think of her if they found out what happened? What would they think of her if they got that memory back? What if they had the same dream as her. She wasn't ready to see her friends, knowing she was the reason they died, just seeing them would make her cry, and if they hadn't gotten that memory back then when they saw her cry, they would ask why. She couldn't lie to them, but she didn't want to tell them just yet. Minako couldn't even bare her own thoughts, she cried and cried.  
As time passed slowly Minako was able to think of the dream over and over, the senshi's death, her cowardly death, everything. But her thoughts were interrupted at six forty-seven from her communicator watch beeping.   
*No! I can't face them! But I must...*  
She walled over to her desk, picked up the communicator, flipped open it, her hair covering her red, puffy eyes and her tear-struck face.   
"Minako, we need your help, a youma is attacking at the museum!" Ami called through.  
"I thought we destroyed them all..." Minako said confused.  
"It's a youma left from the last battle, hurry!" Ami said ending the conversation.  
Minako quickly left. "Venus Crystal Power!" Venus ran to the museum and saw a youma attacking her fellow senshi. *No! I won't let them get hurt!* "Venus Love-Me CHAIN!" She yelled, her chain swinging over to the youma and hitting it directly. "Venus Love-Me CHAIN!" She screamed again, using her chain to wrap the youma around and make it stay still. "Sailor Senshi, hurry finish it off while I have it entangled!"  
"Right. All together senshi! Now! Moon Gorgeous MEDITATION!"  
"Mercury Aqua Rsaspherdy !"  
"Mars Firebird STRIKE!"  
"Jupiter Oak EVOLUTION!"  
As soon as Venus heard Jupiter yell her attack, she let go of her chain and screamed, "Venus Love and Beauty SHOCK!"  
The youma turned to 'moon dust' and Venus could hear Moon cheer in joy. She looked at the senshi, gave a weak smile, said "Good job, senshi." As she de-transformed, she frowned again, her eyes began to water, and she ran.  
"Minako!" Moon cried. "What's wrong? Hey! Come back here! Minako!" Moon de-transformed and ran after Minako, fallowed by Rei, Ami, and Makoto.   
"Minako!" Makoto and Rei screamed worriedly.  
"Minako, you should rest, three attacks in a row will drain you! And we just fought Himishu! Minako, please stop!" Ami yelled.  
But Minako ran further, Ami was right, her body felt like it was when they were fighting Himishu, their last enemy who was exstreamly difficult to beat, but half of her pain was from emotion and the other half, exhaustion, energy drained, and injury. Her body hadn't fully recovered from the battle with Himishu, and she could feel pain from that fight too. Tears swept down her cheeks as she ran.  
Usagi ran after Minako, for some reason, Usagi didn't understand, she was not far behind Minako without trying real hard to keep up.  
Minako was so exhausted, she wanted to rest, her eyes were almost closed, being tired. Her legs burned as she continued running. Her heart felt like steel. No longer could Minako take it. Minako's legs stumbled left and right, then left again. Usagi watched in horror as Minako fell over, thankfully, her head did not hit the concrete, but her arm instead.  
"OH MY KAMI, HELP! MINAKO!" Usagi screamed.  
"Oh, god, Minako!" Rei yelled.  
"MINAKO!" Makoto cried, "What happened to her?!"  
"Somebody go get help!" Ami ordered, "Her energy is almost completely gone, her heart is beating way too fast, and she's barely hanging to life! Oh Kami , please save her!"  
"Minako.....What made so sad?" Usagi asked.  
"What do you mean?" Rei asked.  
"She was crying...Wonder why..." Usagi answered. Rei looked closer to see that Usagi was right.  
"I'm going to take her back to my place, I'll take care of her, "Rei informed, "And I think you guys, should go back home, it's still early, so you can get more sleep."  
"Uh, Rei, I'd take care of her, you know, you don't have to watch over her..." Usagi started.  
"No Usagi, I don't mind, really, now I know your still tired, go home, and sleep. I'll call you when she wakes you, okay?"   
"Uh-okay...But please, remember to call me." Usagi said worriedly.  
"I will, don't worry."  
The group separated and Rei carried Minako to her shrine. She put Minako on the floor of the Great Fire room and sat next to the fire.  
*Usagi is right, Minako was crying and I know there is something wrong, but what? Minako, your always so happy, now it's like I don't know this new person...* "Oh, Great Fire, I plead to you, show me Minako's problems." Rei chanted. After a while she gave up. *The fire won't show me anything, this is strange.* Rei sat over by Minako, who looked much better, she almost looked happy in her unconsciousness/sleep. Rei reached her hand out and place it on Minako's forhead. She didn't quite understand why she was doing this, she never had done something like this, nor did she ever have the power to, but she felt something, something telling her to do this. As her hand felt Minako's head, both girls' forheads shown brightly with their planet symbol. Suddenly, Rei felt a surge of emotion. First depression, then a light dizzy feeling, pure happiness swept over her, a feeling of none other she ever felt. She felt as if she was on air, then, not even in a second, her emotion change, not even knowing why, Rei began to cry. Sorrow, frightened, guilt, and lonesomeness, but it wasn't just that, these feeling were so strong, she almost felt like dying. What was this, how come Minako was like this? She had no reason to be this way, right? These emotions kept looping over and over, as if she kept thinking about the same thing.  
~*Minako's Mind*~  
The dream she had kept playing over and over, like a broken record. She shivered violently as this happened. She wished that she could wake up, but something forbidden her from it. Pain swept entire body, she ached in every inch of her body and soul. Right now an emotional and physical pain reliever would be nice! (I had to write that!^^) Minako then saw herself ready to commit suicide, holding the sword up to her heart. Darkness surrounded her, guilt along with it.  
~*Shrine*~  
Rei felt so much pain, so much evil, so much darkness and guilt. How could anyone live with this pain? It was bazaar of how the emotions mixed, feeling like death would be so much better instead of living with this torture. Heart beating fast, and pain swimming in her body, Rei screamed, finally letting go of Minako. Almost immediately, Rei felt the pain seep away. She was lucky that Grandpa and Chad (sorry about US name) had been out training. (Yes at this hour!) Rei gasped for air, this emotional feelings that Minako was having were so dark, no happy, or good feelings at all, except in that one are, which was overwhelming, it was pure bliss. Rei looked at Minako in sympathy, she didn't know anybody could hold that much emotion. The time was already 10:04 and she hadn't woken up. *Oh, Minako, what's wrong? I wish I could help.* Rei got up and went out of the room, to come back with a hot cloth to put on Minako's head. Not knowing if this would help or not, Rei figured there was no harm in trying. Placing the cloth on her head, she went to get tea for both of them, hoping that Minako would soon wake up.   
~*Minako's Mind*~  
She once again saw her fellow senshi die, pain clenched to their hearts. She saw Makoto die last, and screamed as she had thought Princess Serenity was dead as well.  
*Everyone, everyone, everyone is gone, they're all dead...Ami, Rei, Makoto, Princess Serenity, I have failed our friendship, I have caused destruction upon the universe. I have caused pain before my eyes and not with intention. Kami, I would never have done anything like this on purpose, help me!* She sat alone crying over the losses of her friends. Then she felt it...She felt like someone was still alive. She couldn't tell who or what it was, but she felt somehow better.   
~*Shrine*~  
Minako tossed and turned as she felt herself wake up. A scream escaped her mouth as she felt a pain like no one could imagine. Her heart felt like it had been slashed. Her head fell into her hands and she cried, not caring that she was at Rei's house and that Rei would find out what she had done. She couldn't hold it in any longer. Pain. Her head wanted to burst.   
Rei ran in, hearing this scream. Looking at Minako, there was only one thing to do, Minako had to tell her what was wrong, or else she couldn't help.   
"Rei..." A small squeak came from the blonde as she seen Rei look at her.  
"Minako."Rei said, *I doubt Minako wants to tell me what's wrong, and she's already in so much pain, I can't make it worse for her.* Rei walked over and put a hand on Minako's shoulder. Minako's body was shivering violently. She was scared, so scared and sad.  
"Rei, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry...I can't even begin to explain how I did it, I don't undersand..."  
"Mina, what do you mean, what are you talking about?" Rei asked cautiously.   
"I can't tell you! I CAN'T TELL ANYONE!" Minako exploded. She couldn't stand the thought of what her friends would think of her if she told them. She got up, which was extremely hard, considering, her injuries from the fight with Himishu had not healed and she heart cried as she ran out the door.  
Minako ran down the street not caring where she ended up, but as she kept running a portal opened up before her. Minako let her body fall to the ground.  
"Minako." Pluto began, "I know that you feel horrible about your past, but you cannot help that now. I don't know why you knew about that, but it is clear that no other pain could be so strong. Minako, when I became gaurdian of time I had learned your past and future. You, I must say, has had it almost far worst then the princess, but I can't tell you her secrets. But I know you will not be able to fight or even live with yourself if you would continue with your depression. Minako, I had to see different possibilities of what would happen if I didn't interfere with this, Minako, do you know what you'd do if you'd live in pain and not be over this pain?"  
Minako looked up into Pluto's eyes and just shook her head.  
"Now, please Minako, I know that is a lie."  
Minako's heart felt guilty, she knew she'd kill herself again if Pluto weren't there for her like she was now.  
"But Minako, you don't have to say it, as long as you know it. Mina..You really need some good rest, but if you sleep, you know it wouldn't be good rest. So Mina, I can give you a choice. I can give you a ring that'll take the depression away, but you'll have to tell the group sometime, or else they'd find out on their own, and think that you betrayed them or that you were to coward to tell them. But there is one person you can talk to other then me, you know who that is. This ring will take the depression away, but you'll feel dazed, not yourself. Or, the other choice is to just talk to your friends, which you'll have to do sometime, bu the ring will give you some time to think..What do you want to do?" Pluto asked.  
"Sestuna, you are a great friend. Thank you." Minako said, knowing that Pluto knew what she wanted. (Wow what a sentence) Pluto helped Minako up.  
"Minako, if you decide to tell them soon, tell me, they might react strangely."  
"Oh, Sestuna!" Minako said hugging Pluto with her thanks.   
"Now, Anio Minako, Super Sailor Venus, Princess Venus, Sailor Senshi of Love and Beauty, you must take this and go home, get some rest, if you have problems later, come see me."  
"Thank you, Sestuna." Minako said taking the ring and vanishing as Pluto waved her staff.  
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Okay, okay, I know I didn't get Minako in the gundam world yet, but, I that I'll get it in the next part. ^_~ I had fun writing this, so while fanfiction.net is crashed, I'll am working on this. Sorry about not getting more "Failling Into New Thing" out yet, but I was working on this. I'll get the next part out as soon as possible! Tell me what you think of my story, good, bad, so-so? Ja ne for now! 


	2. Chapter Two: Mixed Emotions

Chapter Two: Mixed Emotions  
  
Hello again! Glad you're back reading this! ^_~ So I thank the people who reviewed! ^^ I'm going to stop talking and write now. =)  
  
Dedication: This story is dedicated to a great author, PrincessVenus, enjoy Bekki!  
  
Special Thanks To: Little Cozmical-chan for always helping me out!  
  
Disclaimer: I do not own Sailor Moon or Gundam Wing! I love them though! =)  
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Minako had gone home feeling odd. Pluto did mention that she'd feel daze, but it was like she was emotionless almost. Sure, Pluto had said she'd feel dazed, but this was beyond dazed. It made her feel almost ill, since there was such a change from extreme depression to normal. In fact, she did feel light headed, and had a stomachache. She had a couple hours of complete rest, her parents gone at work, silence was nice. She sat there gazing at the book she had been reading, but wasn't really reading it. A phone call interrupted her peace and she answered to see who it was.  
"Hello?"   
"Mina, are you okay?" Usagi's voice came through.  
"Oh hi, Usagi, yeah, I'm fine, why do you ask." Minako answered.  
"Uh-your-okay...Then do you wanna come to the senshi meeting?"   
"Huh? Oh, the senshi meeting, I forgot!" Minako said, but not as surprised as she'd normally be. "I'll be right over, Usagi. Ja ne."  
"Ja ne, Minako."  
::click:: The phones hung up at the same time.  
Minako walked to the meeting, not really caring if she was extremely late or not.   
Rei greeted the blonde, but she didn't yell, for what she felt earlier was horrifying of how emotional she was. Everyone looked at Minako worried for their friend.   
Minako sat against the wall, taking in deep breaths every now and then.  
"Uh, Mina, are you feeling okay?" Usagi spoke up.  
"Uh, yeah, sure, fine. Why?" Minako replied wearily.  
"Mmm, you look really pale and sick." Ami answered.  
"I do? Well now that you mention it, I do feel a bit sick."  
"Lay down, it'll make you feel better." Makoto suggested. And Minako did so.  
Rei, on the other hand, couldn't say anything, worried that if she said anything, that it'd make Minako upset.   
Placing tea and cake in front of the group, Rei silently took her spot again. Artemis sat by Minako trying to make her feel better by rubbing his fur against her. Luna sat next to Usagi worried about Minako, but at the same time, wanted to go on with the meeting. But soon Minako fell asleep. Rei, curious if Minako was still scared when she slept, wanted to try out her new power again.  
"Guys, like I said when I called you all you I got a new power and I told you about it. Well, I want to know how's Minako is feeling. So we can help." Rei explained, she sat next to Minako, closed her eyes, and placed a hand on Minako's forehead. Once again the Mars symbol shown on Rei and the Venus symbol on Minako. But as she tried to feel for any emotion in Minako, all she could feel was the urge to vomit. Letting go from Minako's forehead, Rei explained that she couldn't feel anything but sickness.  
"That's very strange, don't you think, I mean from being totally sad to nothing. Nothing at all, emptiness." Makoto replied.  
Usagi couldn't say anything, knowing that Rei was only telling the truth, worried eyes glanced at Minako. Usagi just couldn't understand why she'd be sad, one day happy and cheerful as always, then the next gloomy and depressed. Why? Usagi kept asking herself. *My god, she looks dead.*  
Ami looked over to the 'dead' girl with concerned eyes. "A person cannot take change in emotion that fast, from happy, and cheerful, to sad, beyond sad, to nothing, that's why she's ill, I hope, if not, I think we have a horrible problem. Guys, let's just try to make her feel better. If she's tired let her sleep, she's going to feel sick if I'm right."   
Several nods came by. Usagi slowly nodded, thinking another conclusion for Minako's odd emotions. "But Ames, could it be an enemy, an enemy that makes the person feel horrible then get them sick and then tries to take over the city?"  
"I...I don't know. Maybe, but there's no way telling. But what ever it might be, just don't say anything bad around her." Ami instructed.  
"We won't. I still don't think you could actually know what I felt, when I felt that pain, it was immense. I can't describe it. Now there's nothing, a big blank spot." Rei explained.  
But Usagi understood what Minako and Rei felt, she could sense it in Minako's eyes at the battle, and now she couldn't feel anything, but see the light headed girl. Usagi's eye's fell on Minako's new topaz ring. *Where did Mina get that, when did Mina get that? I'll ask later. I hope she'll be alright, I know what I said was wrong, there's no new enemy, I felt true emotion before. Minako, please, please be alright...*  
Artemis glanced over at his partner, feeling guilty. *I'm suppose to protect Venus, not hurt her, now what? This don't look good, she looked so bad earlier that it was as if she could have died in the spot...*   
The aura of the room was too dark and gloomy to tell that these girls usually are happy, hyper, and cheerful. But in the corner of the room, where Usagi sat, was hope, hope and determination. Nobody said much, too confused and worried to say anything. The time passed slowly, and in twenty minutes Minako slowly aroused to see relieved friends surrounding her. Confusion now went to Minako. "Uh, oops, did I fall asleep? Sorry. I know I should pay attention in a meeting." Minako said, her head hung down in shame.  
"Hey, girl," Usagi said in her best cheerful voice for the moment, "It's okay, you know I do that all the time." Minako smiled at this.  
"Yeah, nobody can beat Usagi in laziness, and you looked tired, we had nothing much to talk about anyway, since there's no enemy at the moment." Rei pointed out, Usagi actually let this fight be won by Rei this time, not caring to fight, but make her friend comfortable.  
"Oh well, usually I'm tired too." Usagi laughed. Minako smiled and the, without any reason, she thought, her heart felt hard in pain, frowning again, Minako put her head on the pillow and, with a hand underneath it, grasped it, not showing anyone that she felt horrible.  
*I know...I know why I'm in pain. I have such wonderful friends, I don't want to loose them. Or him...but isn't it too late? Kami, I need help...Don't let them die...*  
"Hey guys, if the meeting's over, then, can I go home I'm still tired, it took me a long time to get to sleep last night." Minako asked wearily, but not tired.  
"Yea, sure. Go ahead. Mina, I know it took you a long time to sleep, I woke up at four and you were still up." Artemis replied.  
*FOUR!* Everybody's mind (except Artemis and Minako's mind) screamed in shock.   
After Minako left, the group broke up and went their ways. But Usagi went to Minako's house, having a feeling that she was awake. Instead of going to her door to knock at, Usagi heaved herself up on the balcony to Minako's bedroom. Looking through, Usagi was able to tell that Minako was sitting wide awake, sitting on her bed, thinking deeply, for her radio was on, playing her favorite song (doesn't it play a lot?) and she wasn't singing to it. From Usagi's point, it looked like Minako was in a trance, but Usagi knew better. Tapping at her window, Usagi, finally got Minako out of her thoughts and over to the window. Minako's mind, however, wasn't working fast, glancing at the window, it took Mina a while before actually being surprised by Usagi. (Have you ever felt like that, your mind just wasn't working right? You're to deep into your thoughts and all.)  
"Oh, Usagi!" Minako jolted up in surprise. "How long have you been out there?! I'm sorry I didn't let you in!"   
"Hey it's alright." Usagi answered as she was brought inside. "I've only been out there for a few seconds."  
"What are you doing here anyway?"  
"You know."  
"No I don't." Minako tried to force Usagi to go home but she lost, Usagi knowing that Minako was acting strangely.  
"Hey, Minako, where'd you get that ring?" Usagi asked.  
"Oh, this? Oh, I just got it, I thought it looked so pretty, I know I usually don't buy rings, but I had to get this one." Minako felt guilty for lieing to her best friend. She took off the ring and handed it to Usagi for her to see it beter.  
"Okay. Hey girl, what's wrong, you're so blue lately and usually you're as happy as me. But after that battle, I felt your pain. What's wrong?"  
"Nothing." Minako plainly replied.  
"Minako, you know what, I know you may not want to say it, but something is bothering you so bad that you can't even stand yourself that you fall asleep to get away from it. Now I know you, there's something terribly wrong and it's getting to you more then anything else. You're avoiding everyone to go here and think about it, making you feel worse yet. If you don't want to talk about it, then at least, try to have fun and forget about it."  
Minako felt like a knife had gone through her heart. She felt as if Usagi, her best friend, had betrayed her. "How can you say that! Usagi, you know nothing of what I feel! I couldn't stand it when I fell asleep at the meeting, it hurts! If I had a choice, I would never sleep again in my life! But it calls to me, it attacks my heart! I know I have a horrible heart now! That's why I had to try to have a pure heart crystal before, 'cause I knew I wouldn't have a pure heart crystal if I hadn't acted all wonderful, like you and the girls had pure hearts without acting! That's what I am! An actress! No wonder why I was able to be a star in London, I'm so fake! So fake and selfish! If I wouldn't have been so selfish, there would be no problems, but that's the way I am! Right!?" Minako cried away. "If I wouldn't be so selfish (thinking about the past) then there couldn't be any problems, but I caused it! I caused horrible events! I'm a selfish, fake, coward!" Minako shivered violently, her shoulders shaking, silent tears poured down her face.  
Usagi felt like she said something horrible that set Minako off. And she felt awful for even coming there to try to comfort Minako. "Mina...You're not selfish, fake, or a coward, you have no reason to say that. Mina, you're a really nice person who's always there for people. There's no point to make yourself think that. Really..."  
"No, no your wrong Usa-chan. (Sometimes I'll use chan, kun, san, ect.) I thought you knew...but you don't. And I don't know if I can tell you either, I can't tell you, not yet, forgive me. Please forgive me, I know that's asking for a lot, but.....Usagi, I value our friendship so much, I don't want mistakes to happen again..."  
"Well Mina-chan, I cherish are friendship so much, you as my head senshi have to keep strong...I don't know what mistakes your talking about..but if you don't want to tell me its ok, I just don't want you to feel any pain...It tears me apart" Usagi replied, truthfully.  
"Usa-chan, I'm sorry Usagi, but I can't tell you, I'm so sorry!" Minako cried, confused.  
Minako put back on her ring and soon calmed down. But after that, from being depressed to nothing, can, like Ami said, make a person feel ill. Minako became somewhat pale, Usagi noticed this.  
"Mina-chan, are you feeling okay? You look, well, pale." Usagi inquired.  
"Usa-chan...You're right, I don't feel good, I have a headache and a stomachache, and I feel like I'm ready to throw up at any moment. Usa-chan, you should leave, I could be sick..."  
"That's okay Minako, remember, when we were all sick from Emerald's Injector enemy and you helped us out, then you had to fight Injector by yourself, but we became better, it was because of you. Know I'm going to help you. But don't worry, I won't be as bad as last time!" Usagi confidently said.  
Minako gave a weak smile and said, "Thanks, Usagi, you're a great friend."  
*Ami said that this was a side effect of a quite emotional change, so she's not really sick, but the way she looks right now, she sure seems sick. But that's strange...she just became very sad then back to...nothing..Strange. And does she know that this is a side effect? Man, poor Mina-chan.* "Sure Minako, I'm glad to help out." Usagi worriedly, yet smiling, replied.  
After several minutes, Minako became worse, she felt like a fever had hit her hard. Thankfully, for Usagi, she had fallen asleep, moaning every now and then. Usagi put a warm cloth on Mina's head, and left to make some soup for when she'd wake up.  
~*Minako's dream*~   
Mina floated around. Nothing surrounded her, except an golden orange light. She floated for several minutes, into the think air/light. A bright white light escaped from nowhere, making her cover her eyes with her hands, that's when she noticed that she still had on her topaz ring, but different clothes. She was wearing a pale orange, almost golden, silk dress that fell down past her ankles. A locket necklace lay on her chest. Her dress was sleeveless, but had straps that lead to a v-neck.   
Looking back to where the light came from, she suddenly floated, slowly down to a water-like ground. In front of her was a lady that she had thought she had never seen.  
"Princess Minako, hello. I've waited a long time to speak to you." The lady spoke.  
"Princess? How do you know, who are you?" Minako asked surprised. "Where am I?"  
The lady laughed a bit at how fast Minako was asking questions.*She never changed.* But then she frowned, looking disapointed. "Minako, I fingered you wouldn't understand, but I wanted you to know by now..." At this time another woman came out from the shadows.   
Minako gasped, then fell to a curtsey, "Queen Serenity, I didn't know you were here."  
Queen Serenity smiled slightly and replied, "Princess Minako, there is no need for you that."   
Minako gave a confused look, but didn't question Queen Serenity. *Why did she call me Princess Minako? There is no need for her to be formal.* Minako slowly nodded and watched Queen Serenity faced the other woman. They began a conversation that was in a wisper, Minako couldn't here them.  
"Serenity... she's almost there, almost to that point, but I don't know if he can wait."  
"I know, that's why we're here. Can you handle this? Without telling her?"  
"I don't know... Can you help me? It's so hard, I just wish I could tell her everything and give her back her life."  
"I know, I know, remember I have my daughter too. Sister, you can do this, I'll be here to help."  
"Thank you so much, you know I could never do this without your support. Well how do you think I should tell her? I can't just go 'I am your mother, Minako.' No I wouldn't do that, let's make it easy for her."  
"Yes, I understand that." Serenity looked to Minako again. "Minako, do you understand why you are here, why we have brought you here?"   
"No, I do not, but I have a guess. Queen Serenity, I am so very sorry, I never meant anything bad to happen, I never meant to hurt anyone! I can understand if you punish me, and forbid be to be a senshi any longer." Minako cried out, her tears falling freely to the ground.  
"Oh, Minako, no, no don't cry, dear. Chibi Love, don't cry, things will improve." The unknown lady spoke with a kind of love that a mother would have for her child.  
Minako gasped, and looked over to the concerned lady before a flashback stroke her hard.  
~*Flashback*~  
A Minako of the age of five cried as another warrior died against Beryal's men. She shivered in a woman's arms. "Mommy, mommy, I don't want this. I'm scared, mommy, make it all go away." The child wished.  
"Oh, poor Chibi Love, you shouldn't have to know this evil at such a young age. It'll be okay, don't worry. We'll get through this."  
"Mommy, don't go, I don't want you to get hurt. Please Mommy, please don't go!" Minko pleaded.  
"I'm sorry, my dear darling, but it's my job, and it'll be better once it's over, I'll be fine."  
  
"But, please Mommy, you got hurt last time, I don't want that again!" Minako cried harder.  
"Chibi Love, please don't cry, I'll be fine, things will improve, in the name of Venus." And with that Minako watched her 'mommy' run off as a sailor senshi, Sailor Venus.  
~*End Flashback*~  
Minako suddenly got a horrible headache, her hand trembled as she put it on her forehead and fell to the ground, and another flashback overtook her.  
~*Flashback*~  
Minako, now twelve years of age and laid on a bed, rather sad. A knock came at the door.  
"Come in." She answered, the door opened. "Oh hello, mother. What are you doing here, don't you have to be at a meeting?" Minako asked?  
"Chibi Love, it was over hours ago, the girls told me that you weren't feeling well and needed to be alone, so I didn't come here, but you know a mother must comfort her child. I assume your upset about becoming a Sailor Senshi?"  
"You could say that, it's just that, when you were one, you were hurt so much, and it took so much energy for you. You were very strong, I don't know if I can be that strong, I don't know if I can survive. Plus, you had father's love inside of you, but I don't think I'll be like you, mother. I don't think I'll be so strong without love, without the friendship you and the other senshi have. I'm suppose to be a new senshi, along with other girls, and we don't know each other. Mother, I don't think I'm ready, I'm sorry, when Queen Serenity told me I was to fight as a new senshi along with three other girls I don't know, I was afraid, startled, and shocked. Mother, do you think I'm ready? I've had no training or anything, I don't think I'm ready..." Minako explained sadly.  
"Chibi Love, what I think is all you need is your own confidence, you're ready to fight, if you weren't ready, then Serenity wouldn't have let you be a senshi. She, as well as I, know you have what you need to make a good leader for the new senshi. When I give you this ring and pen, I will no longer be of help to the team, except, I can help you, only you. Darling you are a Venusian (is that right?), but you will be on the Moon, so you have to look into your heart and feel out your power from Venus, and use that power to overcome any evil. You have Venus Power in you, but if there comes a battle so horrible that you need more power then what you already have, look to Venus, feel with your heart, and call to me, I can help you gather power from Venus. But you must understand, if you use Venus's power for an emergency in a battle, you'll loose strength and be weak for some time. It's like Queen Serenity when she used the Imperium Silver Crystal (I would use Ginzinshu but that's the wrong spelling, right?) You're strong, and that's a fact, now be strong with Ami, Rei, and Makoto, they're the other girls that'll be joining you."  
"Mother, I can do this. I'll be strong for the Moon, for Venus, and, for most of all, you, mother. I accept my destiny, I just hope that Ami, Rei, and Makoto will be strong too. I hope that we become friends, like you and the other senshi became friends easily."  
"I have a feeling you will be friends, very good friends. Now take this ring, it is a topaz ring, your gemstone, but also, it has a connection between us. While your at the Moon, you'll be able feel me and feel Venus's energy. This ring is the way you can use me to guide you with battle. It has pieces of Venus's rock around the Topaz diamond, so you have a better connection with me and Venus. And this pen, your transformation pen, it'll give you the power you need during battle, with a fuku. It'll give you the strength from Venus and an inner power you'll find out later. As the new Sailor Venus, you must have these items at all times, incase of an unexcepted battle." Minako's 'Mother' explained.  
"Yes, I understand, I will wear this ring on a necklace, so it's close to my heart. And I'll always carry my pen. Thank you, Mother."  
"Chibi Love, hmm...did I ever tell you how I got that nickname?..No? Oh, I thought I had told you before. Well, you're my daughter a 'chibi' version of me, and you have my love and Venus's love always in your heart. (I can't say goddess of love, it just don't work) You can inflict the most powerful love ever and are now, the senshi of love and beauty, Sailor Venus. So you are Chibi Love. Now my dear Minako, things may not be at the best lately, with the formal senshi becoming 'ill' and with you suddenly becoming a sailor senshi, but I promise you, things will improve, in the name of Venus."  
~*End Flashback*~  
Opening her eyes, Minako saw Queen Serenity and the other lady hovering over her with concerned expressions.  
"Oh, Minako, are you okay?" Queen Serenity asked.  
Minako, over thinking these new memories, couldn't answer Queen Serenity's question. She looked at the unknown lady and saw that she was the woman in her visions that she called 'mother'.  
Minako slowly got up, trembling constantly. "A-are-are-are y-you m-m" Minako nervously tried speaking, but failed.  
The lady nodded, and spoke, "Yes, Chibi Love, I'm your mother, Aphrodite."  
Minako didn't know if she should run up and hug her, or gracefully say hello, she didn't know her mother. All she could remember was that her mother was the old Sailor Venus and she was protective and loving. Right now, Minako felt like fainting, the only thing wrong was, she was already asleep. She stayed quiet, standing still.  
"Minako, what's wrong?" Queen Serenity asked, smiling for the two to be finally reunited.  
"Mmmom..." Minako whispered unsurely.  
Aphrodite raised her arms to hug her daughter. At that very same moment, Minako dashed into her mother's arms hugging her with all her might. Minako felt safe for once, she felt comforted, loved, cared for, sheltered, joy filled her heart and she felt relieved.  
"Mother. I've missed you." Minako smiled a true smile for the first time in seventeen hours.  
"Honey, I have come here to guide you. I am so sorry that you have to have all this pain in your life."  
"Oh, mom..Wait, what do you mean 'guide me', guide me with what?"  
At this, Aphrodite let go of her daughter and looked at Queen Serenity for support.  
"No, sister, you have to tell her." Queen Serenity said.  
"Uh...Okay." Aphrodite startd, "Minako, this ring is not a ring that takes depression away, but instead, me and Serenity store it, for it is impossible just to rid emotions, they slip out one time or another... Sailor Pluto meant to give you a different ring, but we switched them, so we'd be in connection with you and so you'd have this Venus Ring."  
"I remember, on Venus you gave me this, I remember you telling me what it's capabilities are. I just had that flashback when you called me Chibi Love."  
"Yes, well this Venus Ring is now able to store your depression, but it will some time slip out of you and you will so many emotions mixed you will think unsurely. I am warning you, Chibi Love, that when this happens you will become so fragile that you will feel like dying would be better then living. Minako, just try to remember this, I know it'll be hard for you when your emotions slip to remember this, but please try to think to look to the sky thinking of our home planet, and use Venus's power warm you. Use it wisely, you will know what I mean if you remember what I say when this time comes. Then there's another thing I wish to tell you. It's about your Venus Ring-"  
"Aphrodite! You know Pluto said never to tell destiny away. Remember what you can and can't say, be strong and don't tell her!" Queen Serenity said, cutting off Aphrodite.  
A sad face overtook Aphrodite and a sigh came from her mouth. "Oh, but sister," she sighed again, "You're right. Pluto's right. Chibi Love, I'm so sorry, if only I could tell you....Minako."  
~*End Dream*~  
"Minako, Minako, Minako!"  
  
The girl known as Chibi Love to her (past) mother gasped as she sat up and looked over around. She sighed as she felt the headache again and realized that she had fallen asleep and was now awake.   
~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`~`  
Mwahahahaha! Nice place to leave off, ne? So are you confused? You should be! Did you like it? Did you hate it? Was it so-so? Well please tell me, and please review! I'm sorry my chapters were so long. But they had reasons to be that long! And I'm very very sorry that I haven't gotten to the Gundam dimension yet. But I needed all that stuff in and the chapter was getting long. ^^;; Well ja ne till next time friends!  
~Stephanie 


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